Dr. Woo’s Miraculous Chilli Elixir is the cure for all that ails and troubles you.
The life-long quest to unlock the secrets of mother nature, led the Dr across the seven seas and through treacherous uncharted lands. Years spent examining the rich flora and fauna of lost worlds, with the pure and honest intention of creating a formula that can relieve all of humanity’s troubles; blood diseases, organ malfunctions, broken bones, skin irritations and incontinence, as well as illnesses of the mind (or neurological ailments) including sadness, malaise, ennui, fear, idiocy, lunacy and the most common ‘broken heart’ syndrome.
We can’t tell you the secret formula, but we can divulge that Dr Woo’s intense scientific analysis, led him to the discovery of Capsican TM, This truly magical ingredient combined with Dr Woo’s extensive knowledge of world cuisine ensures the remedy tastes as good as it heals.
Dr. Woo’s Chilli Elixir is to be taken internally, at least three times a day with food. Try it with breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and if symptoms persist, use it with brunch, elevenses, high tea, and supper as well. Please do not rub it on your skin; rub it on fish, meat and plant-based meat and fish.
Possible side effects include numbness of the mouth, elixir addiction, rapid egestion, and watery eyes. These will be assuaged by daily use and time.
What you are reading herein is known as the small print , that is all.
